Love and Proximity, Being Fresh in Love


Q Why do we want the person to be with us all the time when we are fresh in love?

A The energy of attraction at the beginning of a love relationship is really strong, a bit like an elastic band. When we are not together we feel stretched, and an invisible pull draws us back together again.  This is because in the beloved we perceive all the goodness, the qualities and attributes that we associate with love.

And love is why we come to Earth, to experience, grow and deepen our capacity to love.  At first it all looks so perfect, because we are looking through rose coloured glasses. It is a time of learning so many new things about each other, there is an easy and natural intimacy. This slows down over time as we get to more core areas where we may not be so quick to reveal ourselves, where we may feel shame, guilt, or not good enough. We don’t want to reveal such things and neither does our beloved.  Our stuff starts to come up. So, we start to hide parts of ourselves from each other, and the strong magnetic attraction of initial love starts to slow down. This is a stage that can be worked through, and eventually we can learn to trust and grow together, accepting each other, accommodating each other’s lives and personalities and moving into a deeper and more golden stage of love. 

It is quite important to learn good relationship skills and tools to help, otherwise it can all be a bit overwhelming. I hope that one day such things will be taught in schools, to better equip people for the realities of life.


Shakti Durga

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